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Friday, December 09, 2011

The Waiting is the Hardest Part

Waiting is the point where your decisions are tested.

When I wanted to propose to, who is now, my wife, I called her dad. We talked on the phone for a few minutes and I stumbled and fumbled through my request (I was nervous). At the end of the conversation he said, "I'm going to need to talk it over with my wife and pray about it. Can I call you tomorrow?"

I didn't sleep much that Saturday night and the next day church was a blur. After church, Andrea decided that we should go Christmas shopping (it was, coincidentally, December 9, 2001) and so when her dad called me back I had to put him off for a while until I could get home and have the conversation without Andrea overhearing.

Finally, almost 24 hours after I asked, her parents granted me permission to propose. I waited all of three days after I had the green light.

It's in the moments after we've decided on a course of action, but before the results are known to us that our will is tested. After you've applied for a job, after you've submitted the query letter, after you uploaded your artwork, only after you've stepped out and then begun the interminable process of waiting, do you realize the true import of your decision. Your mind is wracked with all the ways that things could go wrong, you imagine every failure, in excruciating detail. The reality will never be as bad as your imagination.

Waiting is a discipline. Tom Petty was right, the waiting is the hardest part.

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